永远的向日葵

他走了。我早到医院想帮他剪好向日葵。还来不及剪，他就离开了。昨天他说他要死了。我却说“谁说你要死了”。将来若再有人和我说同样一句话，我会说你还有什么事情需要我帮你完成的吗？

昨日旁晚五点多的那一刹那，在床上的Mr T 的笑容，犹如花朵一样绽放，就好像看到了天使一般。是回光返照吧。当时，他吵着要坐出来，我帮他身体上半身放高，他双脚肿胀，我把双脚放在枕头上。然后就在写notes的时候，在那瞬间，我朝他看的时候， 他对我笑了两下。我就有种预感他也许过不了今晚了。

今早的五点左右，Mr T 他离开了人世。应该到了一个更美好的地方，一个没有病痛，只有欢乐的地方吧。我也许不会忘了那时他的笑容，因为带有一点辛酸，却又有点欢慰的感觉。或许刹那间，他看开了。

刚刚我踏进Mr T 的房间看了他一眼。他的脸上是有点痛苦的。我不知道在他灵终的时候想的是什么。至少他不用在痛苦下去。又或许时间够了就好。不必挣扎，不必害怕，就自然得让自己飘上去。不带着任何牵挂，任何包袱，安静的离开吧。

我差一点想把送给Mr T 的向日葵拿回来照顾。可是我决定把他留在床边，也许他的家人会决定和他一起送上天堂。我呢，在花店买了多一朵向日葵，放在医院，就当是纪念他。

谢谢您的陪伴，也感谢您的勇敢，让我更珍惜生命。

Mr T, 祝福您.

A Tribute to me bunny, Snowball~~

Snowball was adopted about 6 yrs ago. She was white at first, before she started to grow brown streaks on her body. She passed away last Sun in the wee hours of the morning. No one saw her go. She had vomitted some fluid I think, I saw some stains on the newspaper. I hope she was not in much pain. Her body was rigid and her ears so cold when I found her lying in the cage. I bathed her and made her as clean as I could possibly could because when she was alive and very ill, I just did not know how to clean her. It was so difficult because she was paralyzed and I think had urinary incontinence. I dried her fur with the hair dryer and placed her in the brown paper box lined with newspaper and padding.

I wondered how she felt at the moment she knew she was going. I figure that animals are the same as humans. I did not spend much time with Snowball on the night she passed away. I thought I bid my farewell the next day but I never got the chance. The last time I really spoke to her was on Sat morning before work. I told her we were going to put her to sleep on Sun. I guessed she knew. She knew that I did not want to put her to sleep as much as I do not wish to see her suffer in pain. I think she left timely so I would not have to make the difficult decision. To me, it was ending a life. Who am I to end a bunny's life?

Dear Snowball,

I'm sorry that I have not been the best owner I could to you. I knew nothing about proper bunny diets and knew nothing except to change your bedding. I never toilet trained you but you were mostly obedient. When I let you run around the back, you loved the dark corners of the room.

Thank you for being with us for the past 6 years. Just like I never knew I would miss having you at the back of the house, I never knew I would cry when you go off to the end of the rainbow.

I hope you will be happy wherever you are.

Luv and Hugs,
Your lousy owner
Sin Yi